HM Insights

8 practical tips for people dealing with separation or divorce

If you are reading this article you are either thinking about separation, you have separated and are wondering what to do next, or you may be looking to help and support a friend, family member or colleague deal with a separation.

Separation is a stressful time. No matter your circumstances, here are some practical tips for separation which will hopefully assist you taking the next steps.


Our 8 tips for a less stressful separation

  1. Take things one stage at a time

    Remember a separation is not easy. Deal with things one day at a time.
  2. Put plans in place

    Think about what you need to arrange, where you will live, how you will manage your job, how you will support yourself and/or your spouse financially and how you will sort out plans for the children to ensure little disruption for them.
  3. Be informed

    Research as much as you can about your legal rights and responsibilities. Also try and find out and gather together as much information and documentation about your family's income and assets as possible.
  4. Be clear about your aims

    Seeing a family law specialist immediately after your separation can be helpful as it will provide you with basic information about the legal system and the procedures and processes involved.
  5. Choose a solicitor carefully

    It may be tempting to seek out a particular aggressive negotiator/litigator, but this may only increase costs - both emotional and financial. The role your solicitor plays can either greatly increase hostility between you and your spouse and increase your costs, or encourage you to see the benefits of a constructive and reasonable approach.
  6. Don’t assume anything

    It may be tempting to listen to the experiences of family and friends who have been through separation and divorce but remember that every case is different. Try not to assume the worst. Get good advice from an experienced family solicitor from the beginning as being informed will hopefully alleviate some of your stress.
  7. Look after yourself

    You should accept support where offered and take good care of yourself. Confide in trusted friends or family to assist you with this difficult process.
  8. There is no timeframe

    There is no fixed timetable in the separation process. Some people will quickly resolve these issues and others will take a longer time to negotiate. For some people the process will be smooth and for others the path will be more difficult. Try to be patient with yourself and remember that separation is a process, not one event.

Get in touch

For help or advice about any matter raised in this article please contact us for a confidential chat.